Menacing Mosquitoes

There are a few things in life that I loathe:

Ignorant people.

Being cold.

Mosquitoes.

The later may just move up the ladder after this summer.

They say, “Oh the mosquitoes aren’t bad yet. Just wait until July when they really come out.” Uh… I’d sooner rather break a number of bones in my body about then and have to be sent home in a body cast.

We’ve been here a total of two weeks now and already I feel like a feasting frenzy for the little buggers. Really, what is their purpose in the circle of life? I mean I’m all for the food chain, but quite frankly I can’t seem to see the good they do in the world. Besides suck my blood and keep me up at night.

I thought I could protect the Little Man from those sneaky fellas. Mosquito netting: Check! Baby-friendly mosquito spray: Check! Layers upon layers and more layers: Check! The problem is that I didn’t want to put the spray on his face or hands for fear it would get into his little eyes or mouth. So that left wide-open, prime sucking space for the vicious vampires.

Look at this face. So sweet. Too sweet for them to resist!

As you can tell, he still thinks he’s a pretty handsome fella. Even with the pink lotion dotting his cute little face.

We do what we can. The baby is wrapped in his mosquito netting.

We go through our nightly ritual of “Smug the Bug” to rid our tent of them as best we can. Our clean canvas walls quickly decorated themselves with black and red splatters as we soon found out that when they land there to test the material, that is your one chance to smash them as hard as you can. By golly, I’ll tell you, it works! Even little Phi gets into it (you tell her to “Swat the bug” and she claps her hands in various places in the air).

It works so well in fact that I may just put that on my next resume.

Jamie Shillig- Expert mosquito swatter. Average 80-90% swats.

Unfortunately, it isn’t ever enough.

One night my feet accidently poked out through the sheets. That’s all it took. I now have a fair number on each foot. They itch so bad that I simply scratch until they bleed. Then they just become open sores. Oddly enough, I’d rather that then the constant itching.

So, here’s to you, you horrible, retched things.

Every time I swat and kill one I think, That’s one less pesky creature that’ll suck my blood.

So for now, just know that it’s Us: a few, against Them: a few thousand.

Let’s hope we make it through the summer.

Gone are the days I stayed awake worrying about bears. Hello to the days lying awake scratching feverishly all over my body.

Love,

Hating Those Menacing Mosquitoes.